Imagine being hand model.
Imagine your hands being your livelihood, but not in the way a carpenter's hands are his livelihood. Or like a dentist's or a brain surgeon's or a sewer's*. Imagine your hands being so goodlooking that you make money from them. People make money from how their faces look, how aesthetically pleasing their features are, and I get that because you can see someone and think Wow, that person is beautiful or even they are just really attractive. And that's fine but I don't think I've ever looked at someone's hands and been all like Phwoar! Check those beauties out!
And then when you think about it, being a model - a face model as opposed to a hand model - is just as dumb because your face is your living. A pleasing countenance is not a skill. Pretty hands and fingers are not a skill. And yet, imagine the stress that must come from being a hand model. Imagine not being able to cook, in case you cut your finger or burn the back of your hand. Imagine you have a job booked and you’re just about to leave to go to the job, but as you open the car door, you somehow break a fingernail. Imagine the sheer horror of looking down to see a jagged nail. Your entire day would be fucked.
I read on BellaSugar that one of the requirements to be a hand model is to have “veinless and poreless” hands. I’m no expert, but in my medical opinion, having hands that are without veins and pores would probably be a very bad thing. In the same article, the hand model from the cover of the Twilight book, the one where the hands are holding the red apple, says that people think hand models live like your average supermodel or rock star. The fuck? People are that stupid? Also, why is the Twilight hand model even being interviewed?
Hand modelling is totally ridiculous. I defy anyone to take their job, their career, as a hand model seriously. I mean, if it was me, if I was the hand model, I would be laughing myself into delirium. I’m getting paid to have pretty hands!!! I would also have the perfect excuse never to cook or clean again. Or do anything again, really. Couldn’t even turn the page of a book, for fear of getting a paper cut. Hand models must love e-readers.
To be honest, I find the whole thing to be a little perplexing and frankly, quite disturbing.
*Sewer. As I typed that word, I immediately thought of the other sewer and that wasn't very pleasant. So I wondered what other words could be used as a substitute and seamstress came up but to my ear, the ess just makes it sound feminine - even though seamstress is apparently a gender-neutral word - and I didn't like the insinuation that sewing was a woman's job/hobby. Dressmaker was suggested (via Twitter. Because nearly all of my pondering and musing is done via this medium these days) but then, probably incorrectly, all I think of is dresses, not just dress meaning clothes in general. Tailor was also suggested but I immediately think of a man, measuring up men for men’s suits. So if not seamstress or dressmaker or tailor, then sewer? I don't know, I don't think any of the words sit right but I do think I'm overthinking it all a bit too much. So, sewer. God, imagine being hand model, guys.